General,  Personal,  Rant

Men boycotting marriage? Say it’s not true!

In this brave new world where bitches be crazy, legal bias against men (men statistically do worse in custody and divorce proceedings than women) is another reason they’re opting out. Women are money-grubbing lazy shrews who trap men into marriage by getting knocked up, then cheat on them, divorce them and walk away with their winnings, rubbing their manicured hands as they go. Taken from Why Straight Men are Boycotting Marriage

That paragraph? It made me laugh and laugh and laugh.

Because bitchez be craycray. No seriously, we all obviously are. We expect them to clean up after themselves, cook their own food, help keep the place clean and take out the garbage every other night that we don’t. How, well… equitable of us!! How dare we!

So ok, that was a bit over the top. My generalisation brush went for a bit of a wide sweep there no?

The topic remains though. Why is everyone still so caught up with conventional marriage?

I don’t think that we should all define a relationship by a slip of paper. My commitment to another person means more than wearing a big unsightly dress down an imaginary aisle to the man of my dreams. And per chance, what if that man is a woman? Then I am banned from walking down said imaginary aisle because our antiquated government believes that a bit of paper should only be shared by those who own a penis and a vagina. We all know the world will go to hell if this ever changes. Just look at the UK.

Then what do I believe should be the norm? Why can’t people go back to hand-fasting? Or jumping the fire? When my cousin and her hubby decided to get hitched they went with a hand-fasting ceremony. It meant that my family were appeased because the ceremony didn’t take place in a church and his family were appeased because there were no mosques or Muslim influence involved I imagine. Granted there was a lot of belly dancing to Turkish music afterwards though. Some things we just can’t not do, yanno?

A traditional hand-fasting is much more moving than a “wedding”. I can only imagine that jumping the fire would be the same.

Alternatively you could do what some very very close friends of mine did and spend the money that they would have on a wedding to run away to Vegas to get married by Elvis and then beamed the ceremony back to Sydney for everyone else to watch.

I raise my glass to those out of the ordinary commitment ceremonies. There, see, commitment ceremonies. Why can’t marriage become that? Because what is marriage at the end of the day but some imaginary figure “blessing” you both to life together. Not that many seem to see the life together for very long, have you seen the divorce rates?

So then I hereby demand that all marriages be commitment ceremonies and that it doesn’t matter what junk you have in your trunk, you should be allowed to commit to anyone you so choose as long as there is love!

4 Comments

  • Mr Peeved

    I read some statistics a couple of years ago that said the average marriage lasts for 12 years. I’m ony assuming that is Australian statistics, but doesn’t that point to the fact that most marriages don’t last? Average is the mid point on the normal distribution curve, so marriages that do last forever are way up the far end, pencil line thin. If I ever do get hitched it will be a commitment ceremony for me.

    • Sharn

      Yup, I whole heartedly agree.

      That’s if I ever do get hitched. At the rate I’m going that might be never! 😀

      12 years? That’s a good slog! Most my relationships to date have only lasted about 3 years – if I’m lucky!

      • Mr Peeved

        Three years is good though. The most interesting people in life are those who have had lots of relationships. I’ve met a few oldies who have only ever been with one or two people and they are boring as f@£k.

        • Sharn

          You think? I’ve heard otherwise.

          Although I’m of the opinion that having multiple relationships previously means that one has the experience of those to draw on. I think it can he really helpful. Wisdom an all that shit.

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