I sometimes envy you guys that you have Christmas, because you see I grew up not knowing about this tradition. Sure I was bombarded with the decorations at the end of the year, but we never really celebrated it. At least not in the gusto that everyone else seems to.
My Christmases more like this…
With a touch of this…
I guess it’s why I’ve always loved the Orphan’s Xmas parties that friends have thrown for those of us that don’t celebrate it, are away from family, don’t talk to our families, are alone and lonely or just don’t have any plans on that day.
This year was no different. My rope family decided that having an Orphans Xmas would be fun. I was so looking forward to it.
Then my mother called. The night before. Letting me know she was going to visit. On Xmas day. I tried not to let my disappointment through in my voice, not sure it worked. At least I had the bottles of wine I got from the work secret santa business to keep me entertained while my mother asked me again why I thought going to a sperm bank to get impregnated was such a bad idea. I wasn’t quite drunk enough to tell her that I don’t need to pay people for sperm. I could easily just go out and get laid. But then that just grossed me out and I thought better of even opening that door.
Because there are women out there that it’s an acceptable way to have a baby. And I’m sure that there are a lot of guys out there wandering around who have no idea that they’ve had a child. Don’t laugh, I know someone who did this one. It goes against everything I believe in. Which is why I no longer know this person. But that’s beside the point.
I went with the valid explanation that I have a cat. A cat that poops, vomits and bites me. And I don’t have the financial or emotional security of being able to raise a child on my own. I believe that a child should have 2 or more parents. Not the one.
So it went. Until she got a call from her friend an hour into ruining my Christmas plans and then promptly told me she is going to go spend the rest of her day at a BBQ out somewhere west where there are tumble weeds. I might have danced a bit, on the inside.
My friend, upon hearing that my mother had dumped me advised me to be outside my building in 4 minutes as he’d organised a cab to pick me up and deliver me to the rope family gathering so that I can roll around there instead of at home alone.
This proved to be fantastic way to end my otherwise miserable day.
There was lots of rolling around on the floor. Drinking sangria (I upgraded from the wine) and giggles, rope, squeals, screams, snoozing under pillows…
Most of all though, I was surrounded by my family of choosing. Sometimes you don’t have to be related by blood to have a bond as strong as blood family.
So I’ve been a bit quiet, a bit withdrawn, a bit crazy and a lot nervous.
Counting down the days until I hear back from the job. Freaking out. Trying to keep busy.
Also I think I found a new thing. It’s called amigumuri.
I’m making a moogle bitches. (if you aren’t a final fantasy fanatic then you probably won’t get this reference…)